What motherhood has done to me

Okay don't get me wrong I love being a mom, but let me tell you this past year of having an infant and raising teenagers is taking its toll on me. And now we are going to have another on...I MUST BE CRAZY! Is the loony bin on its way? Maybe it is just my hormones raging out of control, but the thought of me having four children is becoming quite scary. I love all my children, even though there are days when I wish they (Mainly the teens) would disappear; those days are far and few between. For the most part I could not imagine my life without them. Yet, I sit here and wonder what motherhood has done to me! I use to be able to go out and have a good time, I use to drink with the best of them and party with the best of them. Now my drink of choice has turned to water and my idea of a party usually consist of bounce houses or Chuckie Cheese! Oh and going out lets just say. "What is that?" In the mist of it all, I know that I have know other choice! To me there is no other options. Being a mom is one of my jobs; the most important job! The sad part here is that I do not always take it seriously. There are times when I feel that I am neglecting my motherhood duties and there are other times when I feel that I do to much as a mom. This weekend was one of the latter times. I spent this whole weekend doing things for my children and spending as much time with them as possible. I think the thing that makes me feel like I am neglectful is that I do not get anything in return for this sacrifice. Yeah, I get a thank you mom, but do you think that I get anything else; NO! Now I am not asking for materialistic things, all I would like is a little help now and then. As I sit here and type this, there is a sink full of dishes, there are toys all over the living room floor, the bathrooms need a desperate cleaning, the kitchen floor is a mess, should I continue because the list goes on and on and on! Mind you that we have company due to be here on Thursday and I have to get everything ready for that. Yes, Lloyd may help a little with dishes, but that will probably be the only thing he does. Yes, he will watch the boys on Monday night while I go to my Praying Wife group, but that will be all he does. When I get home I will still have a list of things that need to be done. It must have been nice for him to get to lay on the living room floor tonight and watch a movie while I cooked dinner, took care of the baby, put clothes away, gave the baby a bath, got the other two ready for bed, and now the only time I get is to sit here and type about what motherhood has done to me. I don't want Lloyd to sound like a bad guy, because he is not. He works very hard and provides very well for our family. All I am asking for here is for the other members of my household to step up and take some responsibility! There is going to have to be some changes with the new baby coming and the boys may not like it, but I cannot continue to do it all. Yes, motherhood is one of my jobs, but fortunately it is one that allows me to delegate! So, to answer my own question,this is what motherhood has done to me; I am never satisfied, overly happy, busy beyond belief, sometimes lazy, a little (ok a lot) neurotic, multitasking, always tired, OCD, crazy, disorganized, constantly worried, and just plain old boring, yet there is always something going on. That is my life!